


Inversion

by Xyliandra



Series: Incidental [4]
Category: Yami No Matsuei
Genre: Banter, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Sex, Empathy, Explicit Sexual Content, First Time, M/M, Not Beta Read, Sulking, post-Kyoto
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-24
Updated: 2014-03-24
Packaged: 2018-01-16 21:59:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,125
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1363255
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xyliandra/pseuds/Xyliandra
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It wasn't supposed to happen like this.</p><p>Set an indeterminate number of years after the Kyoto incident and a significant amount of time after "Undertow".</p>
            </blockquote>





	Inversion

**Author's Note:**

> in·ver·sion  
> \in-ˈvər-zhən, -shən\  
> noun  
> -a change in the position, order, or relationship of things so that they are the opposite of what they had been
> 
> -a reversal of position, order, form, or relationship

It wasn’t supposed to happen like this.

No matter how many different scenarios had played out in his head over the years, this was never even a passing thought.

 

Tsuzuki had messed up. Sobs wracked his body as the weight of his errors washed over him. He had failed to protect-

“You don’t always have to be the protector, Tsuzuki. I can take care of you.”

And suddenly, before he realized what his body was doing, he was crashing into Hisoka, lips first. He balled his hands into Hisoka’s sweater, pushing him back into the couch but somehow pulling him into himself all at the same time. He felt the younger man stiffen, but Tsuzuki kept pressing his lips and body into Hisoka’s. After a few moments, he felt Hisoka relax slightly, gently placing those slender hands onto his shoulders.

“Tsuzuki,” he whispered against the older man’s lips, pushing him backwards with controlled strength. Tsuzuki whimpered at the lack of contact. “This isn’t a good idea. We should st-” Tsuzuki crushed Hisoka’s lips under his own, not allowing him to finish.

 _He hasn’t consented. He can’t consent,_ a voice nagged at the back of his thoughts.

 _He wants to stop. You’re no better than Muraki_. He felt Hisoka shudder.

 _He never said no_ , a smaller voice reasoned, trying to quell his fears. Tsuzuki felt hesitant pressure pushing against his lips. _But he’s kissing back_ , he realized, feeling Hisoka’s hands grip his shoulders. Tsuzuki moaned as he felt a tentative tongue sweep across his lips. He brushed his own tongue against the other’s, pulling Hisoka even closer to press their chests together.

Someone cried out.

Hisoka pulled back, gasping for air. Tsuzuki placed kisses along his jawline, making his way lower. He let out a shuddering sigh as Tsuzuki ran his tongue along his neck. “Tsuzuki,” he hissed. Tsuzuki smiled, and continued to lick and suck and nip at the spot that made Hisoka shiver. Hisoka’s hands now clutched his sport coat, gripping the fabric as if it were the only thing keeping him upright.

Olive hands slid under the bulky sweater, sighing as he slid one hand over the smooth planes of the blonde’s chest and abdomen, the other resting at the small of his back. Hisoka tensed at the initial contact, but melted into it, threading his fingers into chocolate strands of hair.

Tsuzuki leaned back to take in the smaller shinigami. His face was flushed, the color creeping onto his ears and neck. His intense eyes closed, dark lashes fanning across his cheeks. His lips parted, soft, pleasurable sounds, barely above a whisper, spilling out. Like this, Hisoka didn’t seem small at all. He felt the taut, hard muscles rippling under Hisoka’s impossibly soft skin. He felt the strength with which Hisoka gripped his body, hard enough to bruise normal flesh.

Tsuzuki had long since stopped thinking of Hisoka as a child who needed protecting. But being able to feel such strength through open caresses was almost too much. Hisoka _was_ fully capable of protecting and caring for him.

Tsuzuki grabbed Hisoka’s waist and pulled him into his lap, loving the way the blonde groaned as their bodies rubbed against one another. Tsuzuki yanked off the sweater in one fluid motion. Hisoka’s eyes fluttered open, pupils dilated, as the cool air assaulted his chest. Emerald eyes locked with amethyst and Hisoka _growled_. Tsuzuki was dimly aware that he hadn’t been shielding himself properly, and some part of him distantly wondered how much of Hisoka’s reactions were his own.

But that part was quickly distracted by the way Hisoka was pulling his hair in some twisted attempt to kiss Tsuzuki again. Hisoka’s mouth muffled the moan that accompanied the sensation. He felt Hisoka pushing his arms off slim hips, deepening the kiss, as he frantically, deftly unbuttoned Tsuzuki’s shirt. He broke the kiss and forcefully pushed the shirt and jacket off of, careful not to tangle the older man in the fabric. Tsuzuki felt a flush of his own seep into his skin as emerald eyes raked over his body with such intensity. He was completely taken aback when Hisoka’s face was suddenly out of view and a warm wetness enveloped his nipple.

Tsuzuki threw his head back against the couch cushions, gasping as Hisoka sucked, then bit, then soothed the nipple with slow licks. _Fuck. Where did he learn that?_ The heat was suddenly gone, and Tsuzuki looked down with a whine and pleading eyes. He saw Hisoka smirking up at him, eyes dancing mischievously through his beautiful lashes.

“Wouldn’t you like to know,” he responded coyly, rubbing his index finger over the abused nipple. After a moment, Hisoka’s smile faded. His caress stilled. “I still think-”

“I think we should move to the bedroom,” he interrupted, standing up suddenly, holding Hisoka to his chest. Hisoka’s legs snaked around the Tsuzuki’s waist and hands grabbed his arms, limbs gripping the older man instinctively, though Tsuzuki had no intention of letting him fall. Hisoka let out a wordless cry as his groin rubbed against Tsuzuki’s torso. Tsuzuki felt nails break skin where Hisoka was gripping his biceps, the skin trying to close back up around the punctures. He groaned, tightening his grip on Hisoka’s waist, pressing him closer.

 

 

It wasn’t supposed to happen like this.

It was supposed to be slow and loving and gentle.

Not moving too fast, lustful, and fighting for dominance.

Hisoka wasn’t supposed to be forcefully grinding his hips. Tsuzuki wasn’t supposed to be marring pale skin with bite marks.

But here they were.

Unable to stop.

Unsure of how to continue.

  


Hisoka was running his tongue along the ridge of his ear, making it difficult to focus on much else. His fingers danced along the body above him, savoring the ability to touch Hisoka’s bare skin unhindered. When Hisoka pulled away from his ear, Tsuzuki caught his lips in a bruising kiss, lacing his hands behind the blonde’s neck. Hisoka returned the kiss just as fervently, nails just barely scratching along Tsuzuki’s arms.

Tsuzuki broke the kiss, rolling onto his stomach and stretching for the pillows just out of reach. Hisoka placed wet kisses along his shoulders and the back of his neck. Tsuzuki grunted, unable to reach—

Hisoka slid his body along Tsuzuki’s, positioning himself so he could move the pillows Tsuzuki was fighting with. He grabbed the bottle there and handed it off before continuing his kisses along his back, fingers ghosting along the muscles.

“Hisoka,” Tsuzuki whined, glancing over his shoulder. Hisoka met his gaze, trying to decode the swirl of emotions he found in those deep jewel-tones eyes. Tsuzuki awkwardly reached around and took a pale hand in his own. He guided Hisoka’s hand lower, pressing the delicate fingers into the crevice. Hisoka froze. Tsuzuki chuckled slightly. _What do you think that was for?_ he thought loudly. Hisoka still hadn’t moved. Tsuzuki squirmed slightly, the air suddenly heavy, pressing down uncomfortably on his chest.

“Asato,” Hisoka began seriously. The use of his given name only intensified the heat running through Tsuzuki’s veins.  “Are you sure?” Tsuzuki rolled onto his back again, happily trapped between elegant limbs. Emerald eyes bore into amethyst.

“Want this,” he moaned, overwhelmed by the intensity. “Need this. Need you.” Tsuzuki grabbed Hisoka’s hand and brought it back to where he desperately needed his touch. Tsuzuki brushed his free hand gently across Hisoka’s cheek. He felt the younger shinigami lean into his touch. “Please,” he nearly sobbed, eyes fluttering shut, hips thrusting against the gentle pressure of digits at his entrance. “Need you need you need you need you need you need you,” he chanted in a desperate whisper.

“It wasn’t supposed to happen like this,” Hisoka sighed, resting his forehead against Tsuzuki’s. The older man’s heart fluttered, warmth filling him as the confession seeped in.

“I know,” Tsuzuki whispered back. The lust and need were temporarily washed out by tenderness, protectiveness, love. He felt the tears forming as Hisoka kept projecting gentle reassurances, soothing away the fears that were bubbling just under the sexual tension.  Hisoka kissed away the tear that escaped. He opened his eyes to find Hisoka smiling down at him, the small, genuine curve of his lips sending a new wave of comfort through his soul. “There’s a lot I should have done differently,” Tsuzuki murmured.

“You did nothing wrong.” Tsuzuki opened his mouth in protest, but it died on his lips as Hisoka’s soft lips found his own. He felt the bed shift as Hisoka leaned over Tsuzuki, never breaking the kiss, and Tsuzuki heard a familiar _click_ , loud in the quiet room. Slick fingers ran over his thighs. Tsuzuki turned his head, breaking away from the kiss.

“Hisoka,” he began, but then lost his nerve to vocalize the words. Hisoka leaned forward and gently kissed Tsuzuki’s forehead.

“You needn’t do anything,” he murmured. “You do so much for me. Please let me take care of you Asato.” Tsuzuki nodded slightly, breathless. “Besides,” he leaned in to whisper in Tsuzuki’s ear, “I can feel your pleasure.” Tsuzuki shivered. “Keep your barriers down.” Tsuzuki suddenly found it difficult to swallow. Hisoka placed a gentle kiss on Tsuzuki’s lips, slow and sensual, a far cry from their previous kisses: demanding, controlling, and forceful. Tsuzuki lowered his barriers, but didn’t let them drop completely. He could never let Hisoka in entirely. Too much darkness. He’d break him.

“Stop that,” Hisoka murmured against his lips. “Stronger than you think, but not the point.” Tsuzuki gasped, feeling lazy caresses along his member and across his balls. Hisoka deepened the kiss and Tsuzuki twined his fingers into sandy blonde hair.  He whimpered as Hisoka’s hand left him, only to groan when it firmly grasped his cock. His hips jerked into the firm, controlled strokes.

Hisoka pulled back from the kiss, hand never stilling, and began to do things to his ear that Tsuzuki wouldn’t have imagined would feel so good. It all felt so good. But not enough.

Tsuzuki felt a knee push apart his own legs before settling in between them. When the second leg joined its brother, Tsuzuki wrapped a leg around Hisoka’s thighs, trying to pull him closer.

“H’sokaaa,” he whimpered, “please…”

Hisoka nipped at his earlobe. “Fine.” Hisoka pulled back from Tsuzuki and used the hand holding him above Tsuzuki to push himself into a kneel. Tsuzuki stared into his emerald eyes.

“Need you,” he whispered.

“I know,” he replied with a small smile. “But we’re not rushing.  If anything is going to happen exactly as it’s supposed to, it’s this part.” Tsuzuki returned the smile.

“Deal.” He felt around the bed beside him, not wanting to break the electric eye contract. His grin grew as his hand connected with what he had been grasping for. He held out the bottle of lube between them. “You’ll need this then. Unless…?” Hisoka snatched it out of his hand, blushing slightly.

“Baka. I know what to do. You’re not the only one who touches himself you know.” Tsuzuki cocked an eyebrow as was about to throw back a witty reply when he felt a cool finger circling his entrance, and the words bled into a moan. “If I had known shutting you up was this easy, I would have done this a long time ago.” Tsuzuki’s eyes widened slightly.

“How long-” Words fell away as Hisoka pushed into him. Tsuzuki gasped, pushing back into the intrusion.

“We can talk later. Thought you needed to be fucked.” He moaned loudly, hands grabbing at Hisoka’s shoulders. _Did he know how fucking hot he sounded?_ The soft chuckle that came from Hisoka hinted that he did. A second finger was inside of him before he could say anything. And then he couldn’t think of anything other than the digits pumping in and out of him and the hand still fisting his cock. He felt Hisoka shudder, heard him panting slightly. Then he felt a jolt of overwhelming pleasure shoot through him. Hisoka stopped moving completely, frozen aside from his harsh breaths.

“ ‘Soka, are you-?” Hisoka shivered then nodded.

“Yeah,” he murmured. He slowly started moving his hands again and then Tsuzuki was being stretched slowly, prepared gently. Tsuzuki chewed his lip, a small twinge of worry breaking through the lust-filled haze. Hisoka leaned forward and kissed his chest. “Empathy.” Then a third finger joined the others, and Tsuzuki heard them both moan.

“It’s enough,” Tsuzuki pleaded, digging his fingernails into the other man. “It’s more than enough. I need to feel you. I need to- ah!” He was surprised to suddenly feel both cold air on his member and emptiness as Hisoka withdrew. He watched as Hisoka picked up the lube again and blurted out, “Let me.” Hisoka nodded poured a generous amount into Tsuzuki’s outstretched hand. “Way too much. It’s gonna get everywhere.”

“Then let’s hope you got the kind that won’t stain.”

“It won’t,” he laughed as he took Hisoka into his hand, marveling in how the younger man felt, loving the emotions that danced across his face as he slid easily up and down, wanting to do nothing but stroke. Except maybe taste.

“Thought you needed to be fucked,” Hisoka repeated breathlessly. “There will be plenty of other times for that.” Tsuzuki let go, staring at Hisoka as his foggy mind processed the words. _Other times._ He felt Hisoka pull his hips off the bed in one easy movement and slide a pillow underneath, gently pushing his legs forward with one arm as he positioned himself.

“Wait,” Tsuzuki breathed, and he saw Hisoka tense up. He gently pushed Hisoka’s arm away and wrapped his legs around the slender waist. “Much better.” Hisoka nodded, and pressed the tip of his member against Tsuzuki’s entrance. Tsuzuki bucked into the pressure. “Please just-”

He saw Hisoka grit his teeth as he slowly slid into Tsuzuki, who moaned at the sensation, feeling Hisoka stretch him, fill him. Hisoka was perfectly still, eyes glazed with passion, and Tsuzuki could only assume he was overwhelmed with sensations. Tsuzuki rubbed small circles on his arms, waiting for him to wade through the emotions and back into reality. It didn’t take too long before Hisoka shuddered, shook his head, then looked down at Tsuzuki with a focused gaze.

“Ready?” he asked, brushing chocolate bangs from his partner’s eyes.

“Only if you are,” Tsuzuki replied, nuzzling into the caress. Hisoka nodded, then pushed further into Tsuzuki, slowly, until he was completely seated inside the older man. Tsuzuki squeezed his legs tight, holding him there, wanting to give him time to adjust to any new emotions. But after a moment he felt Hisoka push back against his legs before thrusting forward again. Tsuzuki groaned and eased up on the embrace. Hisoka could move back further this time, and Tsuzuki shivered as he slowly pulled back before quickly thrusting back in. Pulling out, then thrusting in, pulling out, then thrusting in, pulling out, then thrusting in, pulling out, angling hips, then-

“HISOKA!” he cried, the sharp pleasure coursing through his body as Hisoka found the right spot. He felt Hisoka trembling, and he held on tighter. “Hisoka-” Hisoka started to move again, hitting that spot each time. Tsuzuki couldn’t keep his eyes open. He felt heat pooling in his gut, growing hotter and spreading with each thrust. Even without being touched, Tsuzuki felt overwhelmed, already edging towards ecstasy.

He felt something wet hit his stomach. He blinked his eyes open. He hadn’t-

Hisoka had tears streaming down his face. “Hisoka!” he gasped. “Hisoka! What’s wrong!” Hisoka smiled softly and brushed a hand along Tsuzuki’s cheek. Tsuzuki was surprised to feel wetness there as well.

“Your fault,” he murmured, leaning forward so that he could press their foreheads together. “You were crying first.” He was crying. The physical sensations were too perfect. The emotional connection was-- “Don’t think. Just feel.” Hisoka thrust forward sharply.

Tsuzuki moaned around a sob. “Like that. Don’t have to be gentle.” Hisoka hissed and thrust forcefully again and again and again. He watched blearily through tears as Hisoka grew more and more frantic, green eyes going in and out of focus, tongue darting out to wet supple lips. He felt himself edging closer and closer to release. He cried out as Hisoka’s hand once again wrapped around his cock, stroking it in time with his thrusts. He moved against Hisoka, their pace speeding up and growing more desperate. He wouldn’t last long if-

Hisoka’s mouth attacked his own, tongue forcing its way in and fighting for dominance. Tsuzuki moaned into the fight, feeling the pool of heat grow exponentially. Tongue on tongue. Hand on cock. Cock in ass. Tsuzuki arched. He felt his body stiffen, every muscle contract, as he plunged over the edge. Tsuzuki’s orgasm came violently, covering them in thick spurts of ejaculate.  He felt Hisoka gasp, turning out of the kiss, then breathing heavily into his ear. “Hisoka,” he moaned, tears still spilling from his eyes. Hisoka pounded into him, hands gripping his hips tightly and slamming Tsuzuki into his cock.

“Asato,” he ground out. “I’m going to-” Tsuzuki clamped down around him, still rolling in aftershocks of pleasure. He heard a sharp intake of air, felt the tightening grip and tensing muscles. Tsuzuki shivered as Hisoka pulsed inside of him, filling him, cumming with a soft sob.

Hisoka collapsed onto him, and Tsuzuki wrapped his arms around his partner’s chest. Tsuzuki turned his head to kiss along Hisoka’s cheek and gently rubbed his back in what Tsuzuki hoped was a soothing gesture. Hisoka clutched his arms as sobs continued to shake his body.

It took several minutes for their heartbeats to slow and breathing to normalize. Tsuzuki continued to kiss and rub Hisoka until the sobs stopped and both their tears had dried. He didn’t dare break the silence. He already knew the answer to the question he was going to ask. Hisoka let go of his arms, and pushed himself up to look down at Tsuzuki. Tsuzuki felt his heart clench at the emotions that shone through emerald eyes. Hisoka’s lips curled into a smile unlike any other he had seen.

“Of course I’m fine. Imagine feeling everything you felt two-fold. It’s, well, intense. I’ll get used to it.”

 _Other times._ Tsuzuki shivered.

“Which brings me to this,” Hisoka’s eyes narrowed slightly, but his expression was filled with mirth, “We better be fucking dating, or you can _forget_ other times.” Tsuzuki pulled him close, and they both broke into uncontrollable laughter.

 

 

It wasn’t supposed to happen like this.

But nothing in Tsuzuki’s life happened the way it was supposed to.

Nothing in Hisoka’s did either.

Why would their first time be any different?

**Author's Note:**

> If Hisoka's swearing sounded out of character, I'd like to direct you to the manga where he called Tsuzuki a "fucking vampire" in volume 1.
> 
> Additional author's notes available at http://myrabidpetspoon.livejournal.com/22809.html


End file.
